My (least?) favourite Brazilian Christmas Tradition
Today is Boxing Day, 26th December, and in a few moments I will be going to work. This is not because there is some important project being implemented out of office hours, nor is it because I am involved in some special end-of-year accounting work. It is because 26th December is just another working day here in Brazil. I have been struggling to come to terms with this information for the past week or so.
Not what I think of as a typical Christmas scene… There are at least 3 idiosyncratic details in this shot – the bikini sales man to the mid-right; the skimpy sunga mid-left; the 65 year old woman with a 30 year old’s body and a skimpy bikini to match!
But what I lose today on Boxing Day, I gained on Christmas Eve. Here in Brazil, it seems that Christmas Eve is as big, if not bigger, than Christmas Day itself. We spent the day lounging on the beach trying to stay cool in the stifling heat. But later on that evening we had The Big Family Event.
Before I go throwing out generalisations about Carioca or even Brazilian family tradition, I should acknowledge the fact that I only know this one family – there is every chance that my Brazilian family aren’t anything like everyone else in Rio/Brazil. It occurred to me that I could show myself up (and maybe even my family) if I start saying things like “And after the evening meal, everyone in Brazil sacrifices a chicken to Jesus”. They don’t do that by the way, I’m just illustrating the point.
OK, so here’s what my Brazilian family do. It’s a big family. Around 40 people came along to my uncle’s apartment near the Lagoa and everyone mingled, boozed, chatted and ate. At around midnight everyone wished each other Feliz Natal and several of the more excitable children (still very much awake) started running around the place shouting Amigo Oculto!
Amigo Oculto (Hidden Friend) is the big family solution to Christmas gift economics. If everyone had to buy a present for each of the other 39 people, you can imagine the quality of gift (or the size of the bank overdraft). Instead, a week or two before Christmas, everyone who is going to attend the party is randomly (and secretly) assigned one of the other attendees. When this process was first explained to me, I thought “Oh, it’s what we call Secret Santa”. Partly right, partly wrong.
You may not always like what you’re given. Dilma has received some rather unsavoury surprises from her party this year (from www.humorpolitico.com.br).
Whenever I played Secret Santa (with work colleagues back in London) the giving/receiving process was something of an afterthought. All the presents were placed on a table and then people came up and found the present with their name. In theory you might never know who your Secret Santa was (although gossip, detective work and indiscretion usually meant that everyone worked it out).
But with Amigo Oculto, the giving receiving process is the main event! One person is selected to start the proceedings. They will stand in front of everyone else and begin to describe their hidden friend. But the trick is to do this in a cryptic and amusing fashion. Innuendos, jokes, friendly jibes, red herrings and verbal trickery are all welcome embellishments here. You can see that some people are well-skilled in this art and relish the opportunity to take the spotlight. They will have everyone laughing, shouting out guesses and jokes of their own. It’s really funny and lovely to see a whole family happily playing together like this.
At some point the hidden friend is guessed and they will come up to receive their present in front of everyone. There is cheering and “Ooohs” and “Wows!” to illustrate how much everyone likes the present being given/received. Often the present is a shirt or dress and a chant from the crowd starts up Experimenta! Experimenta! (Try it on! Try it on!). If someone has drawn a particularly convenient/easy amigo oculto (a husband gets his wife; a mother gets her child) a chant goes up of É Marmelada! É Marmelada! (It’s a fix! It’s a fix!). All the while people are drinking, laughing, making jokes. Having received their own gift, the recipient switches roles and begins a new description to be guessed.
This is all very touching, except that during this period I’m waiting nervously, wondering when I will be called up to take my turn. Of course I know who I will be describing and have come up with a vaguely amusing (well, to a five year old possibly) joke in Portuguese. But I find it quite nerve-wracking! I come from a fairly small family. We usually have a nice calm Christmas – we exchange our presents after breakfast and then spend the rest of the day eating yummy food, getting nicely sozzled and reading the newspaper, watching Christmas films, maybe playing a game.
Back in Brazil, my name is called and I go up, amid cheers and encouragement, to receive a great cook-book full of Brazilian recipes. And then it is my turn – I start my description and realise that I have the most forgiving audience in the world. They all laugh at my lame joke, the recipient comes up and gives me a huge bear hug and says he loves his present.
Aftermath of amigo oculto…
So, as a Christmas tradition I find Amigo Oculto a little nerve-wracking, but also a lot of fun and I’m sure as the years go by, this Christmas game will become something I look forward to. I wonder if this is a typical Brazilian tradition or if, like the chicken sacrifices, this is something that only my Brazilian family do.
Apropos of nothing I will leave you with a video of my uncle’s cat, surely the fluffiest cat in all of Brazil. I developed a bit of an obsession and spent much of the night stalking the fluffy beast in order to get some footage. He was pretty shy and elusive and, as you can see, the poor little guy didn’t much like being filmed.
[No chickens were harmed in the writing of this post]
I’m pretty sure this is all Brazilians (at least ALL of the ones Ive met do this) I feel the same way you do – I started planning my amigo oculto speech about a week before Christmas haha :D
Ha ha! Glad it’s not just me!
That IS the fluffiest cat in Brazil… I just wanna squeeze him!
I love how in the “aftermath of amigo oculto” photo, the cat is looking at the backpack like, “Yep… that’s my present. A Nike backpack. Damn skippy!”
As a long serving and proud member of “The Brotherhood of Chicken Inquisitions for Jesus” –Brazil Chapter– ( minorities encouraged to apply btw ), I take offense at your offense that others would be offended if you said chickens are sacrificed to Jesus during Christmas festivities in Brazil.
On the 24th we actually guillotined a bird for each apostle, plus one for Jesus. This was served with a side dish of farofa, meant to symbolize desert sand –we had an Exodus themed dinner this year due our growing Jewish membership–. They, of course, were not welcomed to partake in the Jesus chicken. Regardless, I think we broke barriers.
Just so you know the brotherhood was started by Lisa Bonet admires who appreciate her work in “Angel Heart”, specifically the chicken scene.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zL_XPYLHVJA
We have invited Mrs. Bonet to our gatherings; the farofa was also intended to cater to her Jewish heritage (mother’s side), unfortunately she refuses to answer our e-mails (probably due to an overzealous agent).
Brasilicana – I just wanted to squeeze him too! However, he is annoyingly fast for such a big fluffball ;)
My amigo secreto turned out to be a flop for me.. I sat for a week and practised what i was going to say, and what clues i would be giving for guesing. Hell i decided to promise ne choppe for the person who guesses first.. turned out i was the last one to describe, and since the person who started was suppose to be my secret friend everyone came to knwo because she was the only one left :( and gave some last minute speech..
Oh btw finally tried pamonya 5 mins back.. Very different taste.. sweetish much like cake.. can’t say one of my favourites, if given a choice i think i would prefer a roasted corn with salt, lemon and slight pimenta! :)
Ah Vim! The same thing happened to my wife! As she started off with “My secret friend is…” one of the children shouted out the name! Not very nice!
Pamonha can be a little bit too sweet can’t it? I much prefer the savoury version. When I was in Mexico they served corn covered in butter, lime juice, grated cheese, and chilli! Now *that* was great!
Thanks Tom for a lovely story! I missed Christmas with my family very much this year (celebrated in wet Wales) with all the hugs and good wishes. I can say that’s pretty much the same way most of us celebrate Xmas in Brasilia as well (but not all of course). Slightly different versions of “amigo oculto” (one of them is even called inimigo oculto). Anyway, good reminder of what Xmas is really about (which is definitely not about the gifts). Merry Christmas :)
This was great! I want an amigo oculto!!!!
Abracos,
Alex
@Amanda – wet Wales for Christmas eh? Oh dear, I’m sorry, that sounds like a million miles from the traditional Brazilian Christmas! Did you get to speak to your family at least? Skype is a lifesaver! As much as I loved my Brazilian Christmas, I would have exchanged it in an instant to be with my family back in England. I haven’t seen them for Christmas in 4 years and that’s too long.
@Alex, you’ll get your chance soon I think. And with your language skills you’ll have them rolling in the aisles! :)
Yep, I guess all big families in Brazil celebrate X-mas with amigo oculto and supper.
You have had quite a traditional celebration, with Christmas tree, farofa, and samba as background music afterwards (at least that’s what I heard on the vid).
Dutch people get a bit confused about X-mas and how to celebrate if. After all, they have already celebrated the real thing during Sinterklaas – with all the fuss and traditional stuff required. Then they really get lost during X-mas. To illustrate it, I tell you the story ihave heard from an English colleague. She told her boyfriend during mid December that she was already longing for a good Christmas celebration. Her boyfriend said: “Let’s spend the 26th with a brunch at my parents”. When she arrived there, she smelled no turkey or roast, there was no tree… And for the (a-hem! ) “brunch” there was bread, butter, milk, tea ham and cheese. The in-laws announced : “We have already celebrated Sinterklaas with our granddchildren in November, you see…”. Argh, the Dutch are so direct !
you seemed to have a fantastic Christmas!!
it looks lovely
@Ana – I think I am starting to understand your frustration with this Sinterklaas character! Ham and cheese is no Christmas meal! Sinter Klaas is ruining it! There has to be some kind of merger!
@Anna: It was really nice. I really missed my family (the one back in England and Australia), but my Brazilian family were lovely and helped me try to forget all that :)
you can rest assured that almost every family does that here in Brazil. and true, Christmas’ eve *is* much more “important” than Christmas Day over here, we do everything a day before, all the eating and drinking and the quality time with the family. It beats me why! My family too is very big (around 50 people for Christmas’ eve) and we do Amigo Oculto every single year. but i gotta say you just broke the whole concept of Secret Santa for me, haha! I *always* thought it was just like Amigo Oculto, with all the secrecy and jokes and the finding-out-who-got-you being the best and fun parts. Spread the joy in the UK, my dear friend! :)
Ah thanks Tamara – what a nice comment. I started this blog because I wanted to tell people back in the UK about all the wonderful things I was learning/experiencing here in Brazil. Without meaning to, it seems that I am also providing a service to some Brazilians by telling them what foreigners find charming/amazing/strange about Brazil and also giving them a little education about how we do things in the UK! :)
p.s. we must catch up soon – it’s been ages! Bjs