The unbearable sweetness of wedding
We went to a really lovely (and very fancy) wedding last weekend. I don’t think either of them are regular readers, but on the off-chance, I’ll quickly say a HUGE thanks and congratulations to Fernanda and Sandro. To give you a little taste of just how fancy it was, check this out:
This is Confeitaria Colombo, an incredibly grand and elegant space which first opened in 1894. The huge mirrors and ornate decoration bring to mind images of Paris and La Belle Époque.
I won’t give you a blow-by-blow account, but hopefully this gives a good impression of the levels of opulence I am talking about. If you’re ever in town then you should definitely pop in for afternoon tea to take in the surroundings (and a delectable little cake or two).
Whilst we were chatting about the wedding the next day, I said something that left my wife in shock! In fact she looked almost grief-stricken on my behalf as she asked in a disbelieving voice “You mean you don’t do that in England?”.
Anyone would think that I had told her we didn’t celebrate birthdays or something. In fact I had just mentioned how there always seemed to be so many pretty sweets and little cakes at Brazilian weddings. This is the kind of thing I’m talking about:
These little creamy looking swirls had been delicately burnt on the edges to make them look awesome.
These little chocolate tarts are a bit of Confeitaria Colombo. All night I was thinking that they were "2"s, but I am starting to suspect that they are actually meant to be curly "C"s. Either way, they look yummy right?
Someone is probably going to tell me I'm wrong on this, but these look to me like a style of Portuguese sweet that is very popular here (and presumably in Portugal too). The 2 main ingredients are egg yolks and sugar. Personally, I'm not a fan. But again, they look really nice don't they?
Another one from my wedding. This is a typical Brazilian wedding scene. It's like the battalions of little sweets are trying protect the main wedding cake. I don't want to spoil it for you, but their efforts were futile...
Just to make it clear, British weddings are by no means sugar-free zones. First off there are ‘wedding favours’ which (I think) were traditionally sugared almonds. And of course there is the cake. But I have never seen these legions of tiny cakes back in Britain.
In general, the little tarts are known simply as doces (sweets), but the colourful wrapped parcels are called bem casados (literally ‘well married’). And I’m sorry to indulge in gender stereotypes here, but it seems that these cakey parcels are pretty much the wedding highlight for more than a few Brazilian ladies. For my tastes there is just way too much sugary sweetness going on with these things, but I know at suits at least one Brasileira just fine.
To not think corruption just because someone decide to turn things up a notch – quality wise – while hosting an event in a third world country is quite an accomplishment (seriously).
I think you are starting to shed past prejudices , from thinking that if you live comfortably in a developing nation then you should repent, to having a realistic view of how things come about in Brazil.
I hope your business will bring prosperity to those it involves. Hopefully it will foster a better wedding, better school supplies, a more enhanced learning experience to all that take the opportunities offered so to then make something of it. And with no guilt involved for doing so.
Every BBC correspondent, before preaching about the third world and all the evil minded elites it supossedly encompasses, would do well to read this blog and see how life actually plays out in a country like Brazil.
I know it’s only a post about a wedding in Brazil; but had you not experienced it yourself and only heard about it then could you have written a post basically saying that it is only about a wedding, in Brazil, which happened to be fancy, and very enjoyable?
And there I was thinking this was a post about cakes! ;) I won’t go into too much detail, but the fact that I knew that, financially, this was a big stretch for the happy couple, precluded any class-war thoughts along the lines of “decadent pigs enjoying the stolen wealth of the proletariat while The People are starving outside”.
Though now that I think of it, I almost wish I had written such a post, just so that I could have used the tailor-made title Let them eat cake… (jeez, I kill me). Also there is the fact that I was happily sipping away on the Champagne myself.
I guess that, living in Brazil, one has to find a way of dealing with the fact that there are a large number of people living in close proximity who are very poor and have few prospects. Finding ways to help through financial or other forms of contribution is surely the way to go.
“Finding ways to help through financial or other forms of contribution is surely the way to go.”
Create a job: is there a better way of fostering improvement in society?
This is why I think it’s just criminal when “labor” legislation gets in the way of hiring. As we exchange these messages I know of at least one sure case in which someone wants to hire and can’t; not due to salary but the incurring costs that come with it. If you think of the consequences of that it could be argued that we are witnessing a tragedy (unemployed people tend to suffer higher rates of alcohol abuse, domestic abuse, and so forth).
On a different note: I, like you, don’t really dig sweets at all. I’d rather exchange all the cake and candy for codfish puffs (bolinho de bacalhau), served with awesome olive oil, and perhaps a sprinkle of lime (I’m talking to you Mr. Tahiti) to mix it up a bit.
Am I crazy? I just never got the sweet thing. Is there a support group, if so are sardines on toast served?
You’re right, it is tragic. And frustrating too.
As for the sweet things, I don’t think you’re crazy (though most Brazilians, I suspect, would). Sure they look nice but (to my tastes at least) they are far less interesting than their savoury counterparts (legions of trays of savoury goodies were passed around by waiters before the sweets arrived, but I was too busy eating at that stage to take any photos… ;) )
Oh my goodness! I’m with you on this one Tom. I’ve been to a few Brazilian weddings in my trips down South and they are incredibly lavish! You’re right as well, the sweets are definitely for the benefit of the ladies. As in England, Canadian weddings are not near as huge (150 person wedding is big) and there is not near the decadence, which is not to say we don’t pay attention to details and treating our guests well. How to Brazilians afford these weddings is what I always wonder? With 17 days to go to my own wedding I often think how nice it would be to have access to just a few of these wonderful Brazilian bonbons :)
Ah, how sweet! I hope you have a great day Brae! Congratulations in advance!
I have to say that we definitely went the informal (and therefore less expensive) route and had a lovely time. Much as I love fancy weddings, I do worry about how long it will take everyone to pay them off. Personally I’d rather save the money on those extra flowers and spend it on a nice holiday (hmmm, lucky my wife shares this view, otherwise there would have been fireworks!).
Thanks Tom! I agree with you 100%. Every time my fiance tries to add something that “just one more thing” or “how about just 2 more people” I remind him that every cent we spend on the wedding is 1 cent less toward a new car (needed) and an upgrade on our 800 sq ft condo (needed) ;) For the most part he agrees and so we haven’t cheaped out, but we also aren’t giving away the bank. Keep up the great posts!
Long live the bem-casados! I only wish they were present in birthday parties as well… People don`t get married as often!
I normally get so carried away with all the tasty savoury goodies being passed around that I forget about the cakes and other sweet things. Manuela looks at me horrified the next day when she hears that I didn’t try them all! :)
I happen to know someone who simply can’t wait for the next wedding. She goes to a store in Botafogo every week or two to pick up some bem-casados, sem casamento! By coincidence it happens to be her anniversary today, so parabéns to Priscila!
Stop taking pictures of my wedding!
No, these pictures are beautiful, let Tom show us them! Hi Tom, I’m Larissa, a brazilian living in England, I married in the UK and I was so disappointed I couldn’t have this little sweets at my wedding party, I cooked myself some brigadeiros, but it wasn’t enough, I want to have a big braziliang wedding in my country too. Your blog is awesome!
Hi Larissa! Thanks so much! :D I can imagine how you must have felt without them – my wife looked horrified when I told her that we didn’t have these little sweets at British weddings! I’ve just been looking at your blog – I love it! Parabéns!