Pornographic Plants? Y-Orchid-ding me…

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Sorry about the brutal pun – I’m feeling sick as a dog today and as my health deteriorates, so do my standards of what constitutes acceptable word-play. As mentioned in my last post, I visited the Jardim Botanico a few days ago. And alongside the amazing palms, one of the highlights was the orchid house.

It’s just a pretty flower!

A friend of mine insists that orchids are pornographic – at first I told her she was being ridiculous, but now that she has planted that seed (sorry), I kind of know where she’s coming from. See what you think…

The favela drug lord and the Congolese Consul

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Big news in Rio today – the boss of Rocinha, Rio’s largest favela, was detained last night. Going by the nickname of Nem, he had a price on his head and the story of his capture really belongs in a film.

Nem – presumably not smiling now…

Sun For Sale

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If you Google “What to do in Rio when it rains” you will get a lot of hits. That’s because most of the nicest ‘Rio activities’ involve being outside – lazing on the beach, a churrasco at a friend’s place, a walk to the waterfall, wandering and sight seeing. And of course rain = clouds = you won’t see much from the lookouts at Pão de Açucar or the Cristo. 


When it starts raining, many people seem to go into suspended animation, cancelling everything until the rain stops and normal service can be resumed. 

 

Call everyone to cancel the churrasco, ensure you have plenty of snacks in the house and then prepare for an 80s movie marathon…


But it doesn’t have to be this way! If your event simply can’t be rescheduled and you have enough cash, then there is a solution. The answer lies with an indigenous spirit named Cacique Cobra Coral.

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Skimpy hotties, wrinkly oldies and everything inbetween

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The ‘ideal’ body is a very subjective thing. Where one guy sees a complete hotty, someone else takes one look and says “she needs to eat a sandwich“. Some women like their guys a little on the tubby side (for these women I am thankful), others prefer the chiselled abdominizer model. And of course there are men and women who are into men and women respectively. Well whatever you’re into, you’ll see it on the beach in Rio. And they won’t leave much to the imagination! 


Regardless of body-shape or age, Brazilian women prefer a very skimpy cut to their bikinis – both top and bottom. When the film Rio came out here, there was quite a big fuss that the derrière in the trailer was wearing a very conservative bikini:

 

Seriously, there were articles in the newspaper about this split-second shot and how it wasn’t an accurate representation of Carioca beachwear because it wasn’t revealing enough!

 

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Views To Get Out Of Bed For

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Some problems are good to have aren’t they? Like when the view outside your window at 5.30am is so amazing that you simply have to get out of bed and take a few photos. Then you can’t get back to sleep and you find yourself tired for the rest of the day. I’m not going to get much sympathy here am I? 


Well if I’m going to suffer (yes, suffer) then it seems only right that something good comes out of it. Like today’s post! So here are some of the more memorable views from my window that have sent me scampering for my camera:

This was yesterday morning. We have a saying in England: “Red sky in the morning, shepherd’s warning”. This is the old way of saying that it’s going to rain (everyone knows shepherds can’t stand the rain right?). Well, judging by yesterday’s weather, that saying doesn’t work here.

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